main RSS 2.0 feed http://melindamotivates.com/ en-us Sun, 20 Aug 2017 14:01:05 -0700 Mon, 19 Jun 2017 00:00:00 -0700 Leading a Manipulator http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/69-Leading a Manipulator/ All of us have known someone like this:  Mon, 19 Jun 2017 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/69-Leading a Manipulator/ The Curse of Certainty http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/68-The Curse of Certainty/ Ever said this kind of thing to yourself at work? Wed, 03 May 2017 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/68-The Curse of Certainty/ Know what L.O.V.E. Spells? http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/67-Know what L.O.V.E. Spells?/ ‚Äč Thu, 13 Apr 2017 09:49:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/67-Know what L.O.V.E. Spells?/ Follow the Leader? Not Always. http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/63-Follow the Leader? Not Always./ OK, leaders. Listen up. You’re doing some stuff that runs counter to your goals and interests. You’re confusing people, because what you say differs from what you do. For example: Mon, 30 Jan 2017 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/63-Follow the Leader? Not Always./ Culture: Simplicity and Clarity Rule http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/62-Culture: Simplicity and Clarity Rule/ Oy. So much bureaucracy, so little effectiveness. I suppose if you’re just trying to teach team members how to be involved in groups, this approach is fine. But if you’re really trying to build a culture, simplicity and clarity rule the day.  Tue, 23 Aug 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/62-Culture: Simplicity and Clarity Rule/ Stress http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/61-Stress/   Tue, 26 Jul 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/61-Stress/ Resistance is Exhausting. http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/60-Resistance is Exhausting./ So many irritants, so little time. Cowardly colleagues, pitiful partners, mediocre managers. I could go on and on, but you know what I’m talking about. You’ve either said this or heard it more than once: “This guy is the WORST. His behavior is unacceptable. I can’t stand him.” Wed, 20 Jul 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/60-Resistance is Exhausting./ "I Will Help You." http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/59-"I Will Help You."/ The weirdness started when I was headed home from a speaking gig. Riding from my hotel to the airport, Don the cab driver mentioned that he supports a presidential candidate that I don't. This could have been a nightmarish trip, but it wasn’t. We spent the whole 45 minute ride talking and listening to each other. We were both questioning, searching, wondering how to make our country better. When we reached the airport, I searched for my eyeglasses so I could sign my receipt; when I couldn't find them, Don lent me his. We thanked each other for the good discussion and said goodbye. Mon, 27 Jun 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/59-"I Will Help You."/ How Much Does Your Money Cost? http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/58-How Much Does Your Money Cost?/ We’ve all had this thought: if only I were making more money, I could buy ______________, or feel ______________, or be _______________. We hardly ever think about the cost of making more money. I think we should. Thu, 16 Jun 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/58-How Much Does Your Money Cost?/ What is Your Story? http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/57-What is Your Story?/ When I coach professionals, the most important thing we do together is to find out what story they are telling themselves. Until we become aware of and understand that, we can’t solve much of anything.  Fri, 20 May 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/57-What is Your Story?/ Close the Gap http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/56-Close the Gap/ Everyone has trouble with someone at work. Even you. Maybe it’s a less experienced team member. Maybe it’s a peer. Maybe it’s your boss. Whoever it is, you feel a distance, a wariness setting in toward this Other. Things used to be alright, but for whatever reason, they aren’t anymore. You don’t like the situation.  Mon, 18 Apr 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/56-Close the Gap/ Turn Down the Turmoil on Tough Conversations http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/55-Turn Down the Turmoil on Tough Conversations/ You know how it feels: your gut is tight, your heart rate is up, your hands are sweaty. This is often what happens when you have to engage in a tough conversation with a team member. The hell of it is, you called the meeting, because you’re the leader.  Wed, 23 Mar 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/55-Turn Down the Turmoil on Tough Conversations/ Leading with Empathy: L.O.V.E. at Work http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/54-Leading with Empathy: L.O.V.E. at Work/ Four components comprise L.O.V.E. at work: loyalty, openness, vulnerability, and empathy. Of these, empathy may be the most vital for leaders of professional services firms.  Wed, 10 Feb 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/54-Leading with Empathy: L.O.V.E. at Work/ Leading With Vulnerability: L.O.V.E. at Work http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/53-Leading With Vulnerability: L.O.V.E. at Work/ As a leader, you carry unique burdens. But you can lighten the load and become better at your job by adding vulnerability to your skill set. Yes. You read that right. Thu, 21 Jan 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/53-Leading With Vulnerability: L.O.V.E. at Work/ Civility as a Tactic http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/52-Civility as a Tactic/ Diving into a conversation that simply dumps your needs onto someone else may not be your most effective approach. Without some kind of softener like Hi, how are things going? or Is now a good time?,  you  are omitting an essential part of the equation: whether the listener wants to be engaged with you in that moment. Acknowledging what the other person wants or needs is a pretty good definition of both powerful communication and civility. Mon, 11 Jan 2016 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/52-Civility as a Tactic/ Leading with Openness: L.O.V.E. at Work http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/51-Leading with Openness: L.O.V.E. at Work/ CPA and law firms can feel like secret societies. Executive Committees meet behind closed doors. Partners have their own exclusive retreats. The real requirements for becoming a partner are mysterious and undocumented. Somebody gets fired, everybody gets an email, and nobody ever discusses what happened. Fri, 18 Dec 2015 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/51-Leading with Openness: L.O.V.E. at Work/ Leading with Loyalty: LOVE at Work http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/50-Leading with Loyalty: LOVE at Work/ Love at work is possible, practical, and productive. I’m beginning to understand, though, that it is not simply a goal — a plug ’n play entry into your current mission statement. If love is to be made real at work, it must be an outcome of specific thoughts and behaviors. Love is the result of Loyalty, Openness, Vulnerability, and Empathy. I know: these are not words you hear a lot in firms. But we have to start somewhere if we want to build strong cultures on something other than profit. Love is a great place to begin. Mon, 07 Dec 2015 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/50-Leading with Loyalty: LOVE at Work/ Soft Skills. Oy. http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/48-Soft Skills. Oy./   Mon, 19 Oct 2015 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/48-Soft Skills. Oy./ When and How to Evaluate http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/47-When and How to Evaluate/ When I ask managing partners about their biggest operational challenge, the answer is often how to evaluate the performance of younger team members. They tell me that the young ones don’t know how to take criticism, which leads to uncomfortable conversations. Tue, 13 Oct 2015 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/47-When and How to Evaluate/ My CPA: A Love Story http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/46-My CPA: A Love Story/ People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care became a cliche because it’s true. Tue, 06 Oct 2015 00:00:00 -0700 http://melindamotivates.com/blog/main/46-My CPA: A Love Story/